Erik and Macy - the proposal

There are quite a few things you could do to start off 2011 well. You can throw a big party for your friends, eat well, start losing weight, go on an amazing vacation. Last week I was lucky enough to have the opportunity to witness and photograph one of the very best ways to kick off a new year—a proposal.

I received a phone call last Wednesday morning from a friend at the Hyatt who said she had a customer who needed a photographer that afternoon. Something about how he was proposing to his girlfriend on the beach. Of course I was in, I told her. Ultimate photojournalist challenge.

At 4:30 I headed down to the Lone Eagle Grille and proceeded to pretend I was just taking pictures of the sunset while lingering nearby. Erik and Macy sat on a picnic table quietly, talking and cuddling in the chilly air, watching the sun set over Tahoe.

When they got up to walk around, he threw a snowball, they stood next to this funny half-melted snowman, etc. (I could tell he was nervous from my spot 20 yards away! Adorable.) Then he knelt down.

He pulled out a little box; at first she was in shock—then she said yes.

We did a mini-engagement session after the shock wore off a little. Both are originally from Florida; this was Macy's first time in Tahoe, a Christmas gift from Erik.

What an amazing first couples' session of 2011. I had never witnessed a proposal—personally or professionally—and the emotions were overwhelming. The love just flowed from these two, sweet, deep and strong. They are incredibly lucky, and so am I for having witnessed their moment.

Here's to Macy and Erik: best of luck, you two; happy new year to all. 2011 is going to be a good one.

#reverb10 - December 6

Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it?

Forgive me, for my creativity seems to be stuck behind the pressure of a headache at the moment. As a photographer and relatively arts-oriented person I make things all the time - but the most recent non-work-related objects were a pair of pecan pies on Saturday. I love making the pattern in the edge of the crust with that little rolly tool that stamps neat little radial lines on one side and slices the excess crust off without mercy on the other. Whipping eggs until they're frothy, adding delicious un-heart-healthy sugar, Karo syrup, melted butter, and more chopped pecans than you can shake a stick at. And special vanilla we brought back from Mexico. Mmmm..

I'm working on learning how to make more time for myself, and succeeding too. It started Thanksgiving week, when I finally caught up with my runaway train of work from the fall. I would work late then sleep in, go to the gym, even read - and I didn't think about work once on Thanksgiving.

In my new practice of making time for fun I'd love to pick up my guitar and make music, pick up some knitting needles and make a scarf, maybe even (though it terrifies me) pick up my paintbrushes for the first time in several years and make something beautiful. Most of all I want to make something incredible of myself, which I work at every single day.

#reverb10 - December 5

Let go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?

Let's play The Obvious Game. I went through a bad layoff last year. It felt like the worst breakup I'd ever had. I had been with this newspaper for two years, during which I worked 12, 14, 16-hour days, nights and weekends, for practically nothing. I threw myself into my work with abandon. It was my job, and because I loved it with a passion, it was my life.

I was the local girl, the face and spirit of my hometown paper, which I had returned to serve after college. I made friends with the adults I'd known in my childhood and I adored the small children who begged me constantly to take their picture.

At some point it all came off the rails for the newsgroup that employed me. To put it diplomatically, the staff shrank slowly over the course of about 18 months, strategic promotions were made and due to reigning management opinion suddenly 9 of 11 photographers between eight newspapers found themselves out of a job. Many reporters and office staff, too. The photographers were informed that they were valued less, as it is "easier to teach a reporter to take pictures than a photographer to write."

I was laid off on April Fool's Day, 2009. Not funny, IMO. I had been spared from the first several rounds of layoffs and told I had new, important responsibilities. Cue rug yank...now. As a loyal co-worker angrily asked a GM in a meeting shortly thereafter, "We've cut the fat. And the muscle, and the bone. What's left?"

To make matters worse, these dramatic staff cuts were not publicized or explained. Sources kept e-mailing and calling me, and one by one I had to fight back emotion and tactfully explain what had happened. The paper continued running my photographs without crediting me. The wound was ripped open, again and again.

Because of this it was difficult to move past it. There were maybe three jobs nationwide in the journalism industry at the time; I had no choice but to start a business in a rough economy. To add insult to injury, out of our damaged friendship my editor said and did some very unprofessional, and cruel, things to hurt me further. I can still get worked up about it if I think too hard. But looking back the brass did me a favor. And this year I've started to let it go. Drop by drop, the water slowly slides off my back and I start to smile.

Life is better now. When I work a long day, which I still do with joy, I can sleep in and if I'm two minutes late to my desk there's no one to yell at me. I'm very careful not to micromanage my dog. I go on vacation! I set my schedule and answer to no one but myself, and my wonderful clients. For so, so many of them I would lasso the moon or move mountains.

Will those managers, that newsgroup, ever be the same in my mind? Probably not. Some scars don't ever leave us. But I'm starting to forget how much it hurt. I'm burying it, letting go, and my new-and-improved career is the closure I needed.

Last year I was dealt a blow from which I thought I'd never recover. I thought my life, my self had been taken without a second thought. I know that the company line is often the bottom line. I know now that I'm lucky, because that particular line may just have saved me. I was given the opportunity to let go of it.

As the memory fades I keep climbing.