December 23: New name. Let's meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why?
Princess Consuela Bananahammock. Or maybe Fancy Pants. I'm pretty happy with my own name, though. Jen implies an easygoing wholesomeness, the girl next door. Pretty but not prissy or overly girly. I like that a lot. That's me. Plus it's good to stick with just one name for consistent branding ;)
December 24: Everything's OK. What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead.
My goodness. From a vacuous question to an incredibly complex one. That's quite a leap! I know everything is going to be okay but I'm still not sure everything is going to be okay. It's hard to be under so much stress all the time because you kind of forget what it's like to just live normally.
I had moments this year that reassured me and moments that shattered my faith almost entirely. I had so many wedding leads in the fall and most of them fell through because people just don't feel it's worth the money to hire a professional. Their uncle with the Costco DSLR and no training can do it, they hope I understand that it's just more important to have the 15-foot-tall chocolate fountain. That broke my heart. The only thing that will matter after your wedding day is the book of photos you'll be flipping through when you're 80. Your dress will sit in a box in your closet, your guests won't remember what they ate because let's face it - the fancy dinner choices are often all the same - but they'll look at the photos and remember the fun they had.
I did, however, have friends who took a chance on me and hired me even though I had little wedding experience in the beginning. Every time I delivered a product that was just as good as a high-end studio's work I was so proud and knew this line of work would lead me somewhere good, even if I was a little hungry at first. I also had a pair of professional shooters from a really high-end studio take an interest in me in late 2009 and I spent the summer of 2010 doing a lot of work for them as an associate shooter. Every time they praised my work, or even if they just had constructive criticism, I knew it was all for the better.
I almost lost faith when my dad's unemployment ground on for 11 or 12 weeks. Giving all my extra money to my parents to keep the bills paid and waiting for good news to come down the pipeline so we could stop living in fear. We're still waiting for that news but the thing that gave me hope again was hearing that after my father went to present their product at this huge company, the president of his company called from the U.K. afterward and asked specifically for him to tell him he did a great job. My dad is already my superhero and always has been, but to hear someone else say what I've always known in my heart makes me hopeful.
The last thing that let me know it was going to be okay? When I went to WPPI in March I knew I had finally found my people. Photographers are way cool and being at a convention with 14k of them only reiterates that fact. We work hard and play hard and almost always have fun because we have been given the opportunity to be creative every day. I always wondered what I was supposed to be and second-guessed my path. It was good to feel like it's all been leading to the right place.
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